When we talk about dominance and submission in BDSM, we're talking about consensual power exchange: That means that even if a submissive partner is tied up and allowing the dominant partner to dictate what happens in a scene, the terms have been discussed and agreed upon by all partners beforehand. In fact, the sub can even be thought of as the one in control, since it's the dominant partner's responsibility to always respect their limits. Before trying anything new, talk it over with your partner to make sure you're both into whatever's about to go down. You may be interested in choosing a safe word that stops play if needed. Learning your turn-ons and boundaries (and your partner's) is all part of the fun of BDSM, and discussing your encounter before it happens can be its own anticipation-building form of foreplay. 2. Try out some dirty talk. Even in a post- Fifty Shades world, there's no shame in being new to BDSM. And while investing in kink gear and sex toys can be fun, this kind of play is ultimately about you, your partner or partners, and consensual power exchange, not capitalism. "BDSM doesn’t require any money," kink-friendly sex therapist Michael Aaron tells Allure. "Much of it is psychological, and if you are looking for impact play, many people feel like no toy beats their hands anyway, and that’s free. Likewise, various household items such as rope and clothespins can be used in scenes, and they hardly cost anything at all." (A "scene" is how people commonly refer to a period in which the kinky play goes down.) From safely restraining your partner to experimenting with role-play, here are eight ways you can explore BDSM with your partner tonight. 1. Talk through your interests and boundaries. There are thousands of ways that you can show this, but one way that can be a lot of fun around gift-giving holidays and birthdays is to wrap yourself up as a gift. We spoke to Bodyworker and Sex & Intimacy Coach Libby Sheppard, gynaecologist and co-founder of Hanx Sarah Welsh, and sex and dating expert at The Stag Company Clarissa Bloom, about the pros and cons of exploring kinky sex, plus we share 26 expert tips for beginners on how to enjoy a positive, safe and sexy kink experience: What is kinky sex?

This was really nice thank you, never though i could tape myself it all really worked out fine but after 5-10 mins.. my hands got sweaty and i could free them i guess i would have to use more tape next time? dont know but thank u again u open me to new possibilities XD by the way i am not English so sorry for my writting. Practise bondage safety: never leave a restrained person unattended, even for a moment. If the Dominant needs to leave the room for any reason whatsoever, always release the submissive to avoid catastrophe. Period sex is still considered wildly taboo even though it's perfectly commonplace and we've all done it either accidentally or on purpose at least once before. If you're preparing to shag someone who is bleeding, just think of it as extra red hot lube and dive right in. Contrary to popular belief period sex is not unhygienic and nothing bad will happen to you (aside from ruining your sheets if you don't put a towel down). And for the bleeder? Prepare for relief from cramps, an increased libido, a shorter period and some seriously steamy messy play. Some people really like it, so don't be shy. 22. Anal sexWhether you realize it or not, there are many situations in which knowing how to convert household items into homemade sex toys is a real plus. Maybe you’re away from home and realize you’re without your favorite sex toy; maybe things have gotten heated and you don’t have time to hunt for a vibrator; maybe you’re looking to try a new kink without investing much money. Or maybe you just want to surprise your partner (or yourself). Depriving any one of the sensations associated with sexual pleasure can sharpen the rest, so something as simple as switching off the lights can be remarkably erotic. ' Removing one sense can be a simple and safe way to begin with kinky sex,' says Sheppard. 'Try blindfolding your partner or using sound-muffling headphones.' 2. Bondage

This kinky little game requires the correct accessories, but once you've invested in a vagina pump you're all set. Pussy and clit pumps work by creating a vacuum over the labia and/or clitoris. Increasing blood flow makes the area become (temporarily) engorged and consequently more sensitive and ergo more pleasurable; perfect for a good pounding. 17. Temperature play Get a roll of duct tape. Peel off 8-10 feet, and tape your ankles. Then, your choice. You can, if you so desire, add additional tape above and below your knees. Below I am going to show one way of doing this, adding layer after layer of easy bondage techniques that many people can self-tie. Every layer works independently, so every layer is optional. If a given layer doesn’t appeal to you, don’t do it! Make your gift your own 😉Whatever the reason, Barbara Carrella, a certified sexologist and author of Urban Tantra: Sacred Sex for the Twenty-First Century, says a DIY sex toy (which she calls a pervertible) is never far: “Pervertibles are every day, non-erotic items that can be easily converted into sex toys. They can be found absolutely everywhere, and once you start finding them, it’s hard to stop seeing the erotic potential in all sorts of everyday items.” Fetishists tend to require the object of their attraction at hand to become sexually aroused. 'Kinky sex involves something that you enjoy adding to your experiences, as opposed to a fetish, which suggests you are dependent on that idea/experience for your sexual arousal and enjoyment and cannot experience sexual satisfaction without it,' says Sheppard. Build up slowly: sometimes kinky sex involves mixing pain and pleasure, so it’s important to start slow. ‘I often recommend building up to a fantasy or a fetish if you’re doing it for the first time,’ says Bloom. ‘Take baby steps and see what you do and don’t like.’

Keen to give kink a try? The key to exploring your kinky side starts with open, honest communication and fun! So sit down and talk about what turns you on with your other half before you get started. Discussing your sexual desires with a trusted partner can also serve as foreplay and be seriously steamy. So talk about it, plan what you hope to explore together and enjoy the ride! As long as you're all consenting adults, anything goes and the world is your rubber lobster: 1. Sensory deprivation Sex with strangers can be seriously kinky but also comes with its fair share of risks so proceed with caution. Most dating apps come with casual hook up functionality these days, but if this doesn't appeal you can create the idea of stranger sex without putting yourself at risk. Sign up to a webcam, join Chatroulette to indulge in virtual sex with people you don't know or simply use your imagination. 10. Experiment with sex toysEveryone has different limits and boundaries, and it’s important to respect that. Follow our 6 tips to make sure kinky sex is a safe, positive experience for everyone involved: When finished, have something soft nearby, like a bed, that you can flop on, so you can be a little bit comfortable. And remember the "out." Be sure it's close by, just in case you need it. Self-bondage is dangerous, even potentially deadly. No form of bondage is ever without risk. Self-suspension is an aerial activity with many inherent dangers. Never self-tie alone or without appropriate in-person instruction. By choosing to engage in self-bondage, you take responsibility for your own well-being. Upon viewing these videos, you agree to hold harmless all persons and organizations involved in their creation. Simple single-column tie Handcuffs are another common restraint tool, and they tend to be quite user-friendly. While ropes are highly versatile, you don't have worry about your tying skills with handcuffs, and since you can also use cuffs to ensure the submissive partner is unable to touch themselves, they're handy for experimenting with orgasm denial. Start with some comfy Velcro cuffs, or if you want a realistic-looking pair, try these metal handcuffs from the Fifty Shades of Grey line on for size. 7. Play dress-up. Choose a safe word: it's important to establish a safe word so you can swiftly end any scenario you're not comfortable with if things get too much – and don’t be afraid to use it. As with all sex, kink should be completely consensual so if one or both of you isn’t enjoying the experience, use that safe word and stop immediately.